by Drew Valdez
-- On Friday, Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos revealed a new, purplish-blue mohawk in an Instagram post captioned, “New Year, New Me.” Many believed this meant Bezos was going to change his philanthropic, or lack thereof, ways. However, Bezos himself said the new hairstyle is merely a small change and an attempt to resonate with “the poor people.”
“I just felt like I needed to make a big change this year and I couldn’t really figure out what I could do,” Bezos explained as he threw another pile of $100,000 into a beach house bonfire.
“It’s not a toupee!” said an angry Bezos as he had an Amazon driver run over the accuser.
Bezos was last seen getting a BLM tattoo on his chest however, reports say it will stand for "Billionaires Love Madonna."
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