by Kyle Robinson
-- In an abundance of caution, Soviet Dictator Joseph Stalin has spoken out about ‘Big Tech’ in the United States cracking down on conservative viewpoints, and thus, free speech in the ‘Free World.’ He warns of the atrocities that have followed his own crackdown on freedom of expression.
“I cannot sit idly by while the country we all look for as a beacon of freedom repeats the mistakes of history… also to my own people including the tens of millions killed through my own communist agenda… my bad.” The dictator then veered off into a narcissistic tirade… “They can’t just start using MY tactics… I INVENTED censorship. IT’S TRADEMARKED!!” The U.S.S.R had a sudden uptick in executions immediately following Stalin’s comments.
“He’s completely correct! This man knows what he is talking about, nevermind who caused it over there,” said Dr. Phil as he trudged toward the bunker by the 15th green on his off day.
Notable platforms/networks that have banned President Trump and many well-known conservatives include:
-Courier Pigeons
-William Jessup University Bulletin Board
-Pornhub Comment Threads
-Dick’s Sporting Goods Stock Investor Forum
-All Holiday Inn Express Guest Books
-Jack Dorsey’s Personal Verbal Conversations (sensitive to criticism)
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