by Kyle Robinson
-- As the Freedom Convoy continues to make headlines and cause disruptions, Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has found a narrow pathway to using legal emergency powers to combat the protest.
“I just thought to myself ‘what would dad do?’ Pierre…that is…” said Trudeau as he looked around for approval of his awkward sentence. He continued, “So I decided to rewrite the conditions for claiming emergency powers because all of this is making me look like an authoritarian douchebag!” Trudeau then lit up a high quality cigar while insisting it was ‘in his blood.’ Onlookers appeared suspicious.
Trudeau was seen soon afterwards speaking in fluent Spanish over the phone. A defensive reporter then stepped in on Trudeau’s behalf stating “Nevermind that he looks exactly like Fidel and nothing like Pierre and that his mother was hanging out with Fidel in 1971, stop all of that now!”
Truckers and those associated with them will now be sent to Siberia.
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